Yesterday I had a couple good cries. The first was after I got off Skype. The second came hours later when a pizza I ordered had yet to be delivered. After following up, they said they were slammed and that mine was next to be made. What?! It shouldn't take 2.5 hours to make & deliver a pizza. Again, I cried; and it was the ugly cry. The kind where your face is blotchy, your nose runs, your eyes puff, and you sob almost uncontrollably. Yep, that kind of cry. Clearly my anger and hurt were only partly misdirected at the pizza people.
Fast forward to today. It was again one of those days where I felt like I could ugly cry at about anything. Target didn't have my hair gel (almost ugly cried). In the women's bathroom (felt the tears coming). Trader Joe's is out of pumpkin stuff (now, that is seriously reason to cry).
Anyway, when I left work, I realized the reason why the great parking spot was still available. Apparently, the tree poops. My car was covered in tree dropping. If you look close, you may even be able to see leaves and branches. Again, it could have spurred an ugly cry, instead I just laughed.
On the way home from grocery shopping, I popped into Kohls just to browse. While in the dressing room, I heard a woman ask a stranger what she thought of the dress she was wearing. The woman proceeded to tell the stranger that she was looking for a dress to wear to her mothers funeral.
My heart broke...and I cried. I felt for this woman both because her mother had passed away and because she didn't have anyone to go shopping with her for a dress for the service. In that moment, I also got hit with a 2x4 of perspective. Yes, I feel like I could ugly cry at any moment because I'm angry and hurt. And yes, it's okay to feel these emotions. And in the same breath, there are others in a lot more pain and hurt.
Tears are a mixed bag! I think they're a healthy release and indicate a heart that is tender (which to my way of thinking is a very good thing). Some people cry pretty, but that's not the case w/this girl and I suspect you may have inherited the "ugly cry" gene from your mama! Thank goodness it passes!! I visited my Trader Joe's and called the one in Hillsboro and alas, their warehouse was out of these bars two or three weeks ago!! I guess that means waiting until next year as they told me they're a seasonal item. They did try to push the Cranberry bars on me, but I passed. Here's hoping tomorrow's a dry day! :) Love ya, kiddo!
ReplyDeleteone thing I learned from a great loss a few years ago was to appreciate the tears that now flow more regularly. I decided to not be embarrased by the times and events that trigger them ( your mama can attest to this!). Oh, and by the way, all is not totally lost: I just happen to know where lies a small stash of pumpkin bars.......
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