May 13: Ginny & Michigan

Ginny got a job as a faculty member at Michigan State University.  She will be up there with some great people in the field, and some great friends including Christa (from our cohort) and Alex (recent master's graduate).  She'll be up there for at least two years, as that's her appointment, and I plan on visiting at some point.  Preferably when it's hot in Texas and nice in Michigan.  Or in the fall or spring; but I will avoid that winter-mess.  No, this isn't Ginny's car, I just saw the Michigan plate and thought of her!

January 6: Applied for Graduation

This is the first of many, many, forms and such I have to fill out in order to graduate in Spring.  Ohh, and I have to finish and defend my dissertation.  No big deal.

January 2: iSL Spring Orientation

Today was a long, tired, but good day.  We had our international spring orientation.  This orientation is much smaller than the fall week long orientation, yet still an important way to welcome our new international students.  I crashed when I got home.  Jet lag, and a day of running around will do that to a person.

200th Post

Well, I just realized my last post was my 200th post.  I also realize that this year I'll about double that since I'm doing a picture/post a day.

I'm excited to see all the things God is going to do in my life and through me this year!  And I'm glad I'll have a year of pictures to look back on.

Incarnation: Presence, Sacrifice, and Love

When I was a hall director, July was full of training.  We'd learn protocols and processes for everything from move in, to changing light bulbs, to emergency situations, to conflict resolution... and eventually to move out.  I loved working in housing.  There were rarely dull days, and being able to live-in was a wonderful opportunity to see students at their best and worst, and visa-versa.  As I would prepare for the upcoming year, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, God would often give me a verse or song that would somehow be exactly what I needed for that season.

As another, and hopefully final, school year (at least for me as-student) approaches, I've been asking God to reveal truth through scriptures or songs.

One of my songs from last year was by Steven Curtis Chapman, Definition of Me. The song is included below.  These words spoke deep meaning to me and reminded me to find my worth and value in Christ...despite the many, many, things that were telling me to find my worth elsewhere (i.e., what others think of me; if I pass prelims; if I defend before/after so-and-so).  So as this year was approaching, I began looking for, and asking God to reveal something to me for this upcoming year.

And then it hit me.  Staring me straight in the face, literally.  On my bathroom mirror I had three words, presence, sacrifice, and love.

Last Christmas I was up in Portland and we were headed to my sister's church for service (when I'm up there, we usually rotate between mom's church & CJ's).  Anyway, I remember the music being loud (I think my mom may have even pulled out her phone for a decibel count) and the young pastor who looked like he belonged in Portland (e.g., skinny jeans, sweater).  Although I cannot remember everything from that service, I remember him talking about incarnation and what it meant for Jesus to become flesh and dwell among us.  He spoke that for Jesus, incarnation was really about three things: presence, sacrifice, and love.

For me, those words resinated for weeks to come.  So much that when I was finally home, I wrote them on my mirror & dry eraser board (yes, it's been cleaned since January... I just keep rewriting those words).  I want them to be a reminder for me to live like Jesus did.  He knew he came to make the ultimate sacrifice, and yet, he lived in the present making the most of his days.  Furthermore, his sacrifice was out of the most amazing love, a love that surpasses my understanding.

Thus, as I broach another academic year that is guaranteed to be challenging and celebratory, my hope is to practice presence when I'm with people, look for ways to sacrifice my time and resources, and love others, even when it's difficult.

Now I need to go practice some presence with my dissertation.


Definition of Me
Here come those words again
I run for cover, I’m dodging them.
But still they seem to find their way
around my best defense
Here come those little thoughts
of all I ought to be but I’m not
I try talking to myself
but I’m still not convinced
I’m good, I’m bad, I’m everything in between oh
I’m this, I’m that, but really God we both know

Chorus
It is Your love that defines me
and Your love that reminds me
it’s not what I do
This life I live, You have given
and in You I am hidden
This is what I know is true
that the definition of me is You

This ladder never ends
I climb up then we slide down again
Still they say you’ve not arrived
until you reach the top
But Your kingdom’s upside down
it is the servant who wears the crown
First is last and last is first
and You’re all that I’m not
‘Cause I’m weak, You’re strong, I’m empty ‘til You fill me
I sing this song to keep myself remembering
[Chorus] 

I have been made by You
I have been saved by You
All that I am is all because of You
I’m weak, You’re strong, I’m empty but You fill me
I’m singing this song to keep myself remembering

[Chorus]

Firsts

Last week was filled with firsts and these next couple weeks promise the same. Here are some that top the list.

Started my assistantship on Tuesday.

Had a boss for three days.

Have no boss now (Wednesday they should announce an interim)

Received a study guide for prelims (yeah, those are still 2 years away)

Was completely overwhelmed with the thought of starting school

Was completely underwhelmed because I was 'working' with no work to be done...yet.

I've seen three confederate flags in three days (I can't get used to that, nor do I want to)

And I visited my third official city in Georgia....Commerce, GA (it's where the outlets are)

And this week should be filled with more firsts...

Graduate Assistant orientation (tomorrow)

Grad school orientation (Wednesday)

Program orientation (Friday)

That's a lot of orientating. Anyway, just wanted to let the world...or my little world know that I'm enjoying my time in Georgia thus far!

Oh...yeah...and school starts with 16th. :)

With all these firsts, and of this new beginning, it reminds me of a poem that my friend Kristin shared awhile back. Enjoy.

Help Me to Believe in Beginnings
God of history and of my heart,
so much has happened to me during these whirlwind days:
I've known death and birth;
I've been brave and scared;
I've hurt, I've helped;
I've been honest, I've lied;
I've destroyed, I've created;
I've been with people, I've been lonely;
I've been loyal, I've betrayed;
I've decided, I've waffled;
I've laughed and I've cried.
You know my frail heart and my frayed history -
and now another day begins.

O God, help me to believe in beginnings
and in my beginning again,
no matter how often I've failed before.

Help me to make beginnings:
to begin going out of my weary mind
into fresh dreams,
daring to make my own bold tracks
in the land of now;
to begin forgiving
that I may experience mercy;
to begin questioning the unquestionable
that I may know truth
to begin disciplining
that I may create beauty;
to begin sacrificing
that I may make peace;
to begin loving
that I may realize joy.

Help me to be a beginning to others,
to be a singer to the songless,
a storyteller to the aimless,
a befriender of the friendless;
to become a beginning of hope for the despairing,
of assurance for the doubting,
of reconciliation for the divided;
to become a beginning of freedom for the oppressed,
of comfort for the sorrowing,
of friendship for the forgotten;
to become a beginning of beauty for the forlorn,
of sweetness for the soured,
of gentleness for the angry,
of wholeness for the broken,
of peace for the frightened and violent of the earth.

Help me to believe in beginnings,
to make a beginning,
to be a beginning,
so that I may not just grow old,
but grow new
each day of this wild, amazing life
you call me to live
with the passion of Jesus Christ.

Weeks of Whirlwinds

It's crazy to think that two weeks ago tomorrow (Friday) my sister flew into Austin to begin the adventure to Georgia.

I went down to Austin a little before her plane was to arrive in order to meet up with Trey (former colleague) and Dave (former supervisor). It was great to visit with them and I can't wait to fly into Austin for my Waco visit and (hopefully) get to see them.

There isn't a trip planned yet, but probably sometime this semester.

Anyway...after visiting with the two of them and finding out my sister wasn't going to get in until later than expected, I headed to my favorite coffee shop. A few hours later, we were headed back to Waco.

Saturday we hung around the house during the day and went tortilla tossing that evening; yes it's true, I had not yet been tortilla tossing (final thing to check off the list)

I had mixed feelings about tortilla tossing. 1. it's a tradition, so you must do it. 2. it's a waste of food. 3. the ducks will at least benefit. 4. it's a tradition, right?!

Anyway, my feelings of my own wastefulness (and our bag of 10) were soon out-shadowed by a group of 10 young women. They each came out with a bag of 50 (one or two each). This was the display from their tortilla tossing experience, and by the time I snapped this, there were already an equal number in the water on the other side of the bridge.

Sunday we went to church, then met up with Sarah for some cafe cappuccino action. Sarah had already met my sister when Sarah and I made a trip down to Portland after NASPA last year :)

My sister is a tea snob. She LOVES tea, and well...they gave her a gallon of it at cafe cap! None of us had seen it come in this fashion before.

Sunday afternoon we went to the pool. It was a wonderfully relaxing time! My sister hadn't seen the sun in ages (as she's from the pacific northwest).

Sunday night we met up with Megan for some dinner and dessert. We went to a few places looking for starbucks ice cream...no luck. But we did find some fantastic alternatives.

Monday, we packed the uhaul with the help of some peeps (Thank you Tim, David, and Megan; we couldn't have done it without you!). Then off to the airport to pick up my dad.

Side note: I have been so blessed during this move. Many people have helped in some way or fashion. For example, I had TWO people offer me their cars to tow the uhaul. Since one car already had a tow-hitch, it was the winner of the trip to GA. Thank you Shelton! That alone saved me about $800. Again, amazing. God provides in big and small ways!

Monday night we had dinner at my favorite Mexican food place, altos de jalisco and coffee at CG. This was a wonderful time for my family to interact a few of my friends...and for me to say goodbyes.

Thus far everything seems to be going as planned.

But what's a move without some drama, right?!

Well, Monday night, we go to hitch everything back up and notice that the running lights on the uhaul aren't working. Great. So I call the uhaul emergency number and they send someone out. It was actually pretty quick, however, at almost 10pm when you have to be on the road by 4am, nothing is ever 'that quick'. At a little after midnight, the uhaul mechanic had gone through a few cigarettes, a trip to Wal-Mart for a tool, had redone the wiring, and finally had the running lights working.

We were off to take naps (as you can't truly constitute a few hours of sleep as anything more) for the 3am wake up. We were up at 3ish and packing the final items by 3:45. At 4:30am, we were pulling out of the parking lot.

But again, things can't be that easy. As I drove out of the lot, there was a sound.

Oh it was a bad sound. Like metal on metal.

Thinking it was the uhaul again, I began to mentally curse the uhaul shop that rented me this POJ (piece of junk). As we pulled into the gas station, my dad decided to run alongside the uhaul and listen for the noise.

Unfortunately, it didn't seem to be the uhaul but rather the vehicle. Knowing that Shelton had recently replaced his front breaks, and not knowing what was wrong, we headed to his house to see if we could figure out what was wrong.

So at almost 5am, we were knocking on his door.

After a few trips around the block with the uhaul, it was certain it was the back passenger side and that something was rubbing. They (my dad and Shelton) unhitched the uhaul and raised the vehicle to look at the back breaks. After comparing both sides they realized that whoever did the breaks last (prior to Shelton owning the car) had not replaced the bolt that held the caliber in place, thus when I stepped on the breaks (with all the extra tow weight) the caliber would get thrown forward and rub against the inside rim.

Wow.

Easy fix, right? Just go get another bolt.

So we hung around until 7:30 when auto places opened. Had some breakfast, and waited more. At 7:25, they headed off to get the bolt. At 8, they were back, but unfortunately, with the wrong bolt. So they were off, again. At 9:30, I called my dad to see what was taking so long. Apparently, neither auto place had the right bolt, they tried an auto pull place with no luck, the chevy dealership could get the part in 4 days, so headed back to the auto place to get the most similar size bolt. Nervous.

But it worked, and at 10:30am, we were on the road and headed for Georgia. Only a six hour (ish) delay.

Tuesday we drove to Moody, AL and arrived in Georgia on Wednesday around lunch. WOOHOO!

All in all, once we were on the road, we had no hiccups. And besides, what's a good moving story without some drama. Ha.

More updates to come!

Goodbyes

I've always known it's harder to leave than to be left. I said my first goodbye tonight.

Goodbyes suck.

Facebook Hiatus Over?

I've been without facebook for awhile, over a year. And to be honest, I've enjoyed my life without it. However, I also realize it's a good way to keep in contact with my friends and family, especially as I transition to a new place.

As I've contemplated reactivating my account, I had a friend who challenged me to write about some of the things I've learned this year w/o facebook.

Strange as it may sound, I have learned quite a few things about myself and the use of this social networking site.

*I like simplicity.

*I like technology.

*Nothing replaces face to face interactions, not snail mail, not email, not a facebook message, not a phone call, and not a text.

*I am thankful for my friendships.

*I am lucky, I have friends...true, deep friendships!

*I think we as humans crave deep friendship and for some, they desire it so badly that they seek to find it on facebook (or other social networking sites).

*Facebook sometimes made me feel like a stalker. Like I was privy to parts of peoples lives that weren't meant for the whole world.

*Technology is suppose to improve our lives and make us more productive, yet, we work later and often bring our work home?!

*I am a skeptic; all the information people make available about themselves on the internet makes me nervous.

*I don't like the pressure to reactivate my facebook.

*I just don't like societal norms. But let's not get carried away and throw out all societal norms, especially ones like bathing and deodorant.

*I don't like feeling like an outsider.

*If you don't have facebook you miss out on things. Most of the time, I don't care, but sometimes, it sucks.

And here are few things I learned that I want to unpack a bit more...

*I believe in levels of friendship.

*On facebook, I feel I can maintain closer (fictitious) levels of friendship than I would in real life.

*I'm afraid I don't know how to be disciplined when it comes to facebook.

These three things I've learned have a lot in common. A long time ago, in a philosophy class far far away, we learned about Aristotle and his thoughts on friendship. He describes three types of friendship; a friendship of utility, a friendship based around pleasure, and a complete friendship. For me, I believe there are these types of friendship, but I also think there are friendships for a lifetime, a season, and a circumstance. Aristotle would probably argue that mine are intwined and embedded in his, however, he can't argue, because he's dead...and that's not the point. For me, facebook allows me to take friendships that were for a season or a circumstance and give me the facade that they're for a lifetime. I can maintain a false sense of relationship. Meaning, I can look at someone's photos, see their updates, and in some way feel connected to them, more than I actually am. Thus creating a false sense of friendship...redefining friendship. Now, I'm not one to have many friends on facebook. So the friends I have, were/are at one time...friends. But many have simply become acquaintances or friendships that were intended for a season. Now hear me too when I say that some of the friendships I have are for a lifetime and with that, facebook is a superb tool in allowing them (and me) a glimpse into each others lives in ways that only technology can allow (without being in person, obviously). That being said, I also have a hard time being disciplined in the area of facebook. I know this sounds funny and some would say, just limit yourself per week or so many minutes per day. Well, I get sucked in. I know it has something to do with my longing for friendship and the mentioned above.

I'm sure I will think about these things and more as I continue to contemplate my facebook hiatus.

But one this is sure, as I think about these things, I'm reminded how grateful I am for friendship and community. I have been privileged in this life to experience true community and for that, facebook can aid but never compare.

New Template Design

Blogger just updated their template designs...yay, it's about time! I'm sure I'll be playing around with this in the next few days. :)

I'm so excited!

Ps. It's the simple things in life; like new design templates.

One Week Anniversary

This update will be quick (ish). I'm tired, it's late, and I have a lot to do to prepare for move-in on Tuesday (yikes).

My staff reminded me tonight that we've only been together for a week. Tonight we celebrated our week anniversary by going to the lake and then to the Frozen Yogurt place.

I love my staff. They crack me up! Additionally, they are bonding in ways I couldn't have even hoped for.

I'll blog more later about them and this upcoming year...

But for now...here's a video of a couple of my staff members. Essentially, one of the women is doing a "Dawson's Creek" bulletin board since we live in Allen/Dawson and I tried to catch them as they sang to the karaoke version of the Dawson's Creek theme song.

I do have another version where they 'performed' for me... but that too will have to wait for another day!

Fresh Start

Well, it's been awhile.

Why, you ask?

Summer Institute (SI).

What is SI?

Three weeks of training prior to my CLs (otherwise known as RAs) arrival. Yep, three weeks. So needless to say, my life as I know it is not my own. Things have been more crazy than I thought they would be considering I'm starting my 5th year at Baylor. But I have more responsibilities on my plate as well. Additionally, I take a lot of joy in helping the newbies. So some of this I fully take on myself, and I enjoy it, mostly.

I've been a bit stressed out recently b/c I cannot seem to get ahead. And I am frustrated with myself that things I would like to have had done weeks ago, aren't.

Additionally, I had this brilliant idea last week at 10:30pm to rearrange my apartment. Why?! 1. I like change when I can control it :) 2. A friend posted this cool website on her blog and I wanted to be crafty/creative And 3. I was frustrated that the smallest room in my house was designated as the living room. So with sweat, nearly tears, and a few prayers, my house is now in order and I am loving it!

A picture is worth a thousand words (or so 'they' say). But I don't think the pictures alone will explain this madness.

Below is my front room (it's the room right off my lobby entrance). This was the living room before (and yes, I took the before pictures at Christmas)

I'm not sure if this gives you a good visual representation, but the room is pretty small (esp when you put a couch in it)!

This is the after picture taken today. The front room has now become my reading room. It's cozy, comfortable, and ... cute!

My second bedroom (the middle room) was previously my reading room (here is the before).

And the after picture is below. The middle room is now my bedroom. Although I thought it may be awkward to walk through my bedroom to get to my 'living' room, my friends have assured me it's not (or at least not 'that' awk). Besides, my friends and my staff will be the ones who most frequently use the back living room and if I don't care, they shouldn't either :)

Oh and when I lived in North Russell, I was used people walking through my bedroom to get to my bathroom...one can't expect too much privacy if they live-in.

And finally, my former bedroom (look at how big that room is...)(before)

is now my living room... (after)

I'm so happy with the transformation. But it wasn't easy. And at 10:30pm, one doesn't think to ask for help. Although there were many struggles in moving furniture the biggest feat would have to be the couch. I moved that sucker from the front bedroom through a funky door frame/hallway area into the middle room (fought to move the bed around) and finally made it through the second door frame and into the back room. Phew. Reliving that makes me tired. At one point, I had to take a door off in order to get the couch through on it's side (ish).

To make this situation more ridiculous, I had forgot that we were doing tours of everyones homes as part of summer institute. I had six days from start to finish to get my house in order. What was I thinking?! Thing was, I wasn't. However, I am so happy with the new transformation and the fresh start, both to the year and to my apartment!

Random side-note: the door I removed was too heavy to put back on by myself, so when we did the walk-thru I had two wonderful guys who agreed to put the door back on for me (phew!) and THANKS Peter and Kenny! Without you my door would have remained ... somewhere other than on the hinges. :)

Well, that's it for now. My staff arrives this weekend, so I'm off to finish things...the to-do list just never ends :)

it's official!

I'm moving...not far that is...I have decided to change halls for next year.  So, what does that mean...it means I'm packing boxes, my house is a disaster, and life is crazy.  However, I am excited about this move.  Granted, it isn't what I thought I'd be doing right now...yes, I thought I'd be moving, but not across campus.  So why the move?  Well, this building will be co-ed, which will be different than the last three year (with 500 freshman women) and it will be a mix of freshman and upperclassmen.  In addition, I will be able to work with a living learning community.  This is a community that lives together and takes classes together, two of which I will be teaching.  Yes, that's right, I will get to teach a class in the fall AND one in the spring!  WOOHOO!  Additionally, this living learning community is in leadership, which is what I want to be doing in the long run anyway...so that is very exciting.  ALSO, I know it may not seem like a big deal, but I will be working by myself.  No assistant hall director.  Now I have loved both Ssereta and Charity, but I am very excited to be running things by msyelf...but a little nervous at the same time.  :)  But only a little!

So...anyway, I just thought in the middle of my packing I'd stop and write a little note.  I will post pictures of my next place once I get in...which I'm not sure when that will be yet.  I actually don't have a move date yet either, but they like to give you a moments notice and since the current director will be leaving on Saturday, I am hopeful that I'll get in next week sometime...crossing my fingers! :)

events

for the last few days I've been trying to rearrange my apartment (again). it's a bit out of control. after moving everything to the middle of my room, it's hard to find the right 'spots' for things again. but fortunately, my bed has found its way back to my bedroom, woohoo! as for other things that have been going on. Charity moved in on Sunday. I like her already. oh, something random! her friend who drove from California to Texas with her was actually born and raised in Stockton. crazy?! she graduated from high school the same year I did, however, she went to bear creek, so I tried naming numerous people she should have known. no luck, but I'm determined to find someone we both knew. also, in regard to Charity...on Monday after locking her door and getting ready to take her friend back to the airport, she lost her keys. on this key ring were her apartment keys, her housekeeping key, AND the master key for all the buildings. we have been frantically looking everywhere, calling everyone who has a lost and found...everything. so if you could be in prayer that these keys are recovered, and soon. it's been stressful for her and it makes for a really tough first impression. thanks!

in other news, fourth of July was yesterday! :) we had a nice barbecue with a lot of the staff, it was great fun. that was until one of the little ones (2?) slipped off the step in the pool and went under. two of us were in the pool and as she went under her dad and sharia both saw and jumped in to get her. it was quiet a feat, the two of us in the pool wouldn't have been able to get there any faster. she was fine, she was barely under for but a second or two, but what a scare! she was fine and even got back in the pool (a little later). the rest of the night was uneventful.

that's it for now, my plans for the rest of the week (minus work stuff) are to get my apartment back in order! woohoo!

here goes!

so I labeled this 'new beginnings' because it is a new beginning for me. It's the beginning of a blog and the beginning of another year (academic year, yeah training starts in less than a month!). I can't believe how quickly time flies. Two years ago, I was moving across the country to start a new job, and here I find myself, going into my third year as a hall director (and still enjoying it)! I never, in my craziest dreams would have thought I would have ended up in small town Texas, never. But God has quiet the sense of humor! I can't believe it was two years ago I was moving in, and now I look back and realized I've learned so much from this experience. I thought I had done a lot of growing prior to this change, boy was I wrong! :) I look back on myself and who I was two years ago, and I'm different. Yes, I'm the same person with the same strong will, stubbornness, perfectionist, determination, and spirit, but I've grown, and I've changed. My character has been tested, my patience tried, my heart broken, my body bruised, my thoughts challenged, and my strength stretched. Yet I am stronger, smarter (hopefully), more content, more joyful, and more determined to be and make the most of this life that God has given me. And not all of these last two years have been difficult, I've had tremendous times of joy, laughter, hysteria, and memories that will travel with me wherever I may go. God has been faithful in bringing me through the difficult times and I know and trust he will be with me as I continue through this next year and the many years to come!

so, speaking of laughter and memories, I just returned back home from a trip to Colorado, South Dakota, and Wyoming. I flew into Colorado, met up with my old roommate and a couple other friends and drove to see Mt. Rushmore, Yellowstone, and the Grand Tetons. Two less states to visit. Oh, I've decided I would like to see all 50 states (I had yet to visit South Dakota and Wyoming). Below are a few pictures from the trip! It was a wonderful trip full of so many laughs, such beauty, and Gods handy work! :)

This picture is the group of us girls who traveled from Colorado to Wyoming together. Two of them (Kristel (to my rt) and Jenny (below me)) actually started out in California, Britney (left) and I met up with them in CO. Ps, I just love this picture of us 1. we are so cute, and 2. it was just us goofing around with the camera. :) Here is part of Mt Rushmore, it's suppose to be this grandiose thing, and it is (but look, I could squish his little head!) :)Look at us! You think they'll carve a mountain with our faces on it next? Ha! For Britney, Jenny, Shannon, and Kristel, you think?

so this may look random, and, it is! Remember those laughs and memories?! We drove through a city called Chugwater, and we just had to pull over and take a picture of us...chugging water! :) We also came across a sign that said Crazy Woman Creek, we regrettably, don't have a picture from that place. :(

Here is the picture of us at Old Faithful, which really is both, old, and faithful. They (someone, somewhere) predicted that she would go off at 12:21 and sure enough, 12:22 came and she was off! Just a really cute picture of us :)

So after seeing Mt Rushmore and Yellowstone we headed to the Grand Tetons. This was probably my favorite stop on the trip! This Mt range in incredible! I wish I lived closer b/c I would visit frequently. This picture if from our hike. We stopped at Jenny Lake and took a boat from one side of the lake to the other. They let us off near the bottom of a trail to 'hidden falls'. It's a short hike but a magnificent view of the falls (the picture to the left is not the magnificent view, just me very happy that we got to do more hiking!)

And lastly, here is a picture of the Grand Tetons themselves! Aren't they incredible, and what a beautiful day we had!

Other things we saw included: Bears (both Brown and Grizzly), Deer, Elk, a man playing in a band with two female manikins (it's a long story), Bison (walking in the middle of the two lane road), and so many other fun and 'interesting' things. Well, I hope you our adventure, we sure did! :)

ps I have had a difficult time with picture alignment and such. I ended up deleting them b/c they were left justified and having to start over, rearrange again and again. If anyone knows what I did wrong, or how to help, please let me know for future postings, thanks!

beginning!

journals are difficult for me! They always have and probably forever will be! Even now as I attempt this blog, it's taken me weeks to actually 'start'. I've changed fonts, played with colors, previewed, and rearranged. I believe a lot of this is because of the permanency of journaling. I also believe this process is difficult b/c I'm primarily a verbal processor and like to talk things through, however, I hope to use this as a venue for lots of random things, thoughts, updates, and more. It is my hope that this will become an electronic journal, scrapbook, though provoking (wishing)...blog. Enjoy, I know (hope) I will! :)